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EVERYONE FREAK THE FUCK OUT AND PANIC BUY EVERYTHING!!!

BREAKING NEWS: CPR REPORT IS OUT NOW, UNEXPECTED RESULT

\*\*Before You Quit Your Job To Day Trade, Learn Basic Math\*\* \*\*I mean this in the most blunt and harsh way possible to try and help as many people as I can.\*\* Some of you are planning your financial freedom around returns you haven’t even bothered to calculate. “I only need 1–3% a day.” “I’ll start small and flip $500 into $4000.” “I just need trading to cover my bills.” (Professional traders have a base salary btw….) Fine. Let’s put actual numbers next to those statements. \*\*1. Your daily income target has nothing to do with how much the market moves.\*\* Here’s a basic ATR (average true range statistic, not the indicator you’re hoping will save you) calculation of EUR/USD’s historical percentage moves over the last 15 years : \*\*Measurement\*\* \*\*Average positive period return\*\* \*\*Daily: +0.369%\*\* \*\*Yearly: +7.65%\*\* Average negative period return \*\*Daily: −0.363%\*\* \*\*Yearly: −6.00%\*\* Average full high-to-low range \*\*Daily: 0.632%\*\* \*\*Yearly: 12.06%\*\* Look at that daily range again: \*\*0.632%.\*\* \*\*That is the entire distance between the day’s high and low. Capturing all of it in one trade means getting both your entry and exit exactly right.\*\* \*\*You’re attempting to achieve 1-3% DAILY returns on financial instruments that don’t even move that percentage on average DAILY but sure go trade the news so you can pass that prop firm challenge lol\*\* Now suppose you capture a quarter of that range: \*\*0.158%.\*\* To turn that into a 3% account gain, you need approximately \*\*19 times your account equity in exposure\*\*. A 0.158% move against that same position costs approximately 3% of your account. Let me put that in terms of pips so you get it, that’s \*\*17.4 pips on EURUSD\*\* You remembered to multiply the profit by your leverage. Did you remember to multiply the loss? Hopefully some of you guys have requested a crypto withdrawal from that unregulated exchange after reading this but if you haven’t let’s continue. \*\*2. “Flipping an account” is a cute way to avoid saying “I need a 700% return.”\*\* Turning $500 into $4,000 = \*\*700% return\*\* EUR/USD’s average annual high-to-low range in this calculation was roughly 12%. Your “flipped” account return is approximately \*\*58 times that entire annual range\*\*. Those are different measurements. The gap is what you’re expecting leverage and repeated successful trades to bridge. . \*\*Having a smaller account does not make a 700% return easier. It just makes the dollar target sound less ridiculous.\*\* “Built different” is not a variable in the equation. Please just one person listen to what I’m explaining, most won’t but one of you can I believe it. \*\*3. GET A JOB. Your bills are eating the capital you need to trade.\*\* I mean this genuinely. Save yourself years of financial damage trying to force a small account to replace a salary. Like honestly if you’re not starting with 25k worth of capital just get a JOB, your time is literally WORTH more. The S&P returns on average 10% percent a year. Let’s say you’re extra SPECIAL and do have 25k and you get a 30% in a year. That’s only $7500 on a 25k account…. Go get a job. MAX OUT YOUR 401k and Roth. Save 3-6 months worth of income in cash as your emergency funds and THEN think about depositing into a trading account. PLEASE. Yes it will be difficult, but not as difficult as trailing your stop during London so you don’t get margin called 😂 Professional traders at established firms receive a base salary plus a bonus. A losing week does not cancel their paycheck. Poor performance can cost them their bonus or job, but their grocery money does not depend on winning the next trade. Your landlord expects payment on schedule. The market never agreed to provide profitable opportunities on that schedule. Get a paycheck. Stop making your next trade responsible for keeping the lights on. And yes, AI wrote this post. Apparently both of us had to explain percentages to you. If you still think you’re turning $500 into $4,000 because you’re “built different,” ask me about my course :) I’ve identified a much more reliable source of income than trading: you Good luck to all you that will continue your journey regardless, may the odds be in your favor. (Please share how your strategy is different below) This is a satirical post, some will get it others won’t. Love you all, happy trading

# JUST CHECKED MY BROKERAGE, IT'S ALMOST OVER. # I AM GONNA MAX OUT MY CREDIT CARDS AND ESCAPE TO CANADA.

:screech: I BETTER SEE THE WSB LIVE CHAT BACK UP 1 HOUR BEFORE MARKET OPEN, OR I'M GONNA BE BIG MAD! 😡 CAN'T MISS OUT ON THE LIVE CPI REACTION WITH HOMIES!

:screech: MASSIVE GREEN DAYS AHEAD!!!! EVERYTHING ON MASSIVE SALEZ!!!!! 1 MONTH OUT CALLS FOR FREE GAIN!!!!!

REALLY ENJOYED THE 10 POINTS OF RANGE ON SPX TODAY TOTALLY NOT THE MARKET DRYING OUT FROM INSIDER TRADING.

MAXING OUT MY CHAT GPT USUAGE TO BURN OPEN AI MONEY!!! BRING ON THE CRASH!!!!

TEXTBOOK WEAK HANDS SHAKE OUT LMAO

🗣️ good 2 days of puts. NOW YOU BUY CALLS 1 MONTH OUT. MASSIVE SALES.

EVERY FUCKING BEAR BREAKDOWN ON SPY IS FUCKING BULLED OUT OF THE PLANET

SO MANY DEGENS WILL BLOW UP TODAY LOL CAUSE THEY CANT SIT OUT 1 SESSION

ITS OVER BROS, MEMORY IS NO LONGER NECESSARY, PANIC THE FUCK OUT AND SELL EVERYTHING, THE KUNG FU PEOPLE IS COMING FOR YOU

FREAK TF OUT AND SELL EVERYTHING

First step commission free platform and only use cash account. Never trade short and play long. Only trade highly liquid stock. Never ever invest on low liquid stocks. QUICK IN AND OUT.

SOLD OUT, thank you everyone! BUT - the giveaway lives on! Comment per the instructions to enter! Looking forward to much more future fun. Happy stacking.

MICRON TOP DRAM CUSTOMER PULLS OUT OF 2027 CONTRACT, FUTURES DOWN

KOSPI BREACHING THE 5000s PANIC THE FUCK OUT

DOOMSDAY AHEAD!!! FREAK THE FUCK OUT!!!! :screech:

HEY MAN. TRADESBYSCI ON YOUTUBE IS THE ONLY GUY YOU NEED TO WATCH. EVERYONE ELSE DOES CLICKBAIT CONTENT AND SELLS COURSES. SCI DOES EVERYTHING FOR FREE AND HOSTS REAL FREE EVENTS. NO ONE ELSE WILL GIVE YOU THIS SAUCE AND IS SERIOUSLY MISSING OUT ON HIS AMAZING CONTENT. SCI DOES EVERY THING FOR FREE AND MAKES MONEY TRADING SO HE DOESNT SELL COURSES. LOOK HIM UP WHEN YOU GET A CHANCE AND YOU WILL NOT REGRET IT.

**HOLY SHIT GUYS I AM FREAKKNG THE FUCK OUT**

SEMIS TO ZERO FREAK THE FUQ OUT 🤌🤌🤌

THE CAT IS OUT THE BAG !!!

You can do it GME, BREAK OUT!

Rotate OUT OF Reddit and into CRBS?